Thursday, July 15, 2010

I am a Hot Mess

I'm in a bit of a pickle. Let me introduce you to the most topical anxiety of Craig Blake's summer: my horribly questionable future. That's right, I've got a horribly questionable future. Here is the current state of my emotional well-being:

It's a metaphor, you see. At the moment I am on three law school waiting lists. And although I've attempted to keep my hopes fairly low, I'm still crossing my fingers that I will be accepted to at least one of the remaining three schools any day now. This has become a problem because I have no idea what to expect out of the next three years, and especially the next year, of my life. I could get a phone call at any moment and move to another state in just a few weeks, or I could not get a phone call and dramatically increase my cocaine intake to drown the pain of personal failure. Either way, I win! (Disclaimer: I don't do cocaine. If I don't get into law school, I will not do any cocaine. But I might spend one weekend alone eating ice cream in the middle of the night and watching While You Were Sleeping.)

This has made it pretty tough for me to make any decisions in my life that range from a "moderate" to "mega-hard" difficulty level. At the outset of nearly any decision, I think, "Well, what if I move?" In fact, I think it has even impeded my ability to make decisions that don't have an awful lot to do with anything. Those used to be my favorite decisions. I am in limbo, and I have been for months. It is a terrible place to be. Take, for example, Rasputin from Anastasia. He hated living in Limbo. He even sang a whole song about it.

Anyway, I had a whole plan to write about my recent victory as the 14th of July 2010 champion (51 runs down the slip 'n' slide) or confess my true feelings about Lana Lang from Smallville (not as rosy-colored as you might think. I've been eyeing Ms. Lang with a very critical eye. Very interesting!) I had a whole list of things to write about. I wrote this instead. This way, if I'm still living in Salt Lake in two months, you will have enough information to taunt me about my recent failures.

In other news, my birthday is on Monday, July 19. I'll be turning 24. I'm not completely sure what I'm going to do, but I haven't ruled taping a pack of sparklers to my old scooter, lighting it on fire and pushing it off a building. Actually, yes I have. I'm back to having no real plans. Anyway, feel completely welcome to shower me with unusual amounts of attention.

In the meantime, please enjoy the most underrated song by the Beach Boys!

Extra Credit: Here is something I wrote for my work. It's a blog. It's a fun time. Look at it if you want.


Jeff said...

That song has never been underrated to me. Good luck with the Law School thing--it's quite ridiculous how they do that to people.

jaime said...

Did you pick that song cause you think your dumb?? Dumdumdumdum doobedoobedoo dumdumdumdum...just thought I'd point that out. I don't think your dumb though, you need better self esteem man! Will it help if we make the Team Craig shirts? We have a shirtless shot of you now thanks to the 14th of July festivus party. We could glitterfy that no problem! :-)

Craig Barlow B. said...

I'm pretty sure Team Craig shirts will be the last straw to send me spiraling into insanity.