Monday, September 27, 2010

Law School Corner - Consideration

Hey there everyone. I have recently gotten sick. I don't know exactly how it happened, but this all began after I went to an event featuring dueling pianos. The concept is that you have two guys and two pianos, and they play and sing basically any song that is requested and the audience sings along, including me. Just know this: when I sing along, I SING ALONG. I am serious about singing along.
Immediately after the dueling pianos party, my throat began to get itchy until yesterday, when I turned into a giant, sweaty, burning hot, wet mess all over my body. I think I might have caught a contagious, disgusting disease by singing. Last night I woke up 4 times in the middle of the night. I tell you this mostly so you will feel bad for me and give me attention.

Now, let me tell you a little bit about going to law school.

Here is a handy fact I picked up the other day that you could apply in your very own life. Today's lesson: Consideration. Consideration is an aspect of Contract law. Contrary to common believe, a contract can be formed without a written document. Most contracts can be simply oral promises, so watch your back.

Consideration is a concept that helps courts decide whether or not a promise is enforceable. So although a promise might have been made, the law will basically say it can't be enforced unless it has consideration.

The quickest test to gauge if consideration exists is the Bargain-Exchange Method:

1. Did the promisor make the promise in order to induce the promisee to do (or not do) something?
2. Did the promisee do (or not do) that thing in order to recieve the promise made by the promisor?

Here is an example of a promise where there is consideration, and is thus enforceable:

Promisor: Hey Craig, if you give me your Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman DVD's, I will give you my authentic mountain man outfit.

Craig: You've got yourself a deal! What a fool! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

In this example, the Promisor makes a promise to give me his mountain man outfit in order to induce me to give him my Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman DVD's. In turn, I am giving him my Dr. Quinn Medicine Woman DVD's so that he will give me his mountain man outfit. In this case, there is consideration and either side could sue if either of us failed to live up to our promises.

Here is an example of a promise where there is no consideration:

Promisor: Tell you what Craig, take my authentic mountain man outfit. You need it more than I do.

Craig: You've got yourself a deal. What a fool! HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

In this case, I didn't do anything in order to get the promisor to give me his authentic mountain man suit, and he isn't giving it to me in order to induce me to do anything. Thus, there is no consideration and he is not legally obligated to give me his mountain man suit. If he decides later, "Gee, this mountain man outfit really apeals to my wacky sense of style. Craig can rot in Hell, without so much as an authentic mountain man outfit!" then I have no legal recourse to get him to give me his mountain man outfit.

Obviously these examples are pretty simple, but for more difficult cases, you still apply the same Bargain-Exchange Method. Basically, consideration ensures you don't make a gratuitious promise, like offering to give a gift, and then get sued for never doing so. This is good news for me, because no one can sue me to collect on all the French kisses I have promised in the past.
Meanwhile, I have somehow tricked you to read law school curriculum. Now, don't you feel like a fool?

Anyway, we'll see if anyone finds this interesting. This is a Law School Corner test run. What I learned from the last post is that if I leave anything on the Internet long enough, I can even get two comments without resorting to dancing like a fool, alone in my apartment.

Final Note: There are some exceptions when a promise is still enforceable, even without consideration. I'm not going to talk about them. Just know these exceptions are likely perilously hanging over your head, waiting to crush your soul. If you only promise to French kiss a few people, you'll probably be safe. French kissing is the number one issue clogging our litigation system.

Thursday, September 16, 2010

Hats Off to Fashion and Charm

Today I watched some Project Runway. The main principal of Project Runway is that every time Craig says, "That's a dumb hat," Heidi Klum says, "What a fashionable hat!" Apparently, these hats...

...aren't dumb hats, they are actually really, really cool hats. Turns out wearing an inverted umbrella on your head is a really sleek fashion. So many opportunities wasted. I'm sure I'm not alone. How many rust ceramics have you failed to strap to your face? How many times have you given up the chance to wear a humongous polyester flower on your head? Now, don't you feel like a fool?

Anyway, I feel like a lot of blog-worthy thoughts have been zooming by lately, but I have struggled to remember them. Despite the fact that I occasionlly take time out of my busy schedule to film and edit instructional sexy dancing videos, I'm actually fairly busy lately. I can't just dance sexily all the time. I have to attend school now so I can protect a future full of seduction. Putting that sexy, sexy future in peril is my greatest anxiety.

Meanwhile, my friend Elizabeth recently posted a song I thought was very charming. So I've gathered 5 charming songs total. Prepare to be charmed. (3 of the 5 were made public by Elizabeth, and I am riding her coattails, figuratively and literally. Elizabeth wears the finest penguin-tail tuxedos.) You are about to be charmed to shreds:

1. The Zombies - The Way I Feel Inside

2. Steve Martin and Bernadette Peters - Tonight You Belong to Me

3. The Beatles - Honey Pie

4. Zooey Deschanel - Hello Dolly

Kyu Sakamoto - Ue O Muite Aruko

Wednesday, September 8, 2010

The Art of Seduction

This morning I was watching CNN while I ate a bowl of Apple Zingers, because I'm an adult. The good news is nothing terrible happened in the world yesterday or this morning. I could tell, because the news anchors were focusing on the following two stories:

1. A wakeboarding dog.
2. Researchers at the University of Northumberland have discovered which dance moves women find most attractive.

It's times like these that I'm grateful for research universities. These guys have really cut to the root of the problem: What use is curing Cancer if men are incapable of getting out on the dance floor and turning women on?

This is an effective use of science. Well, men who read this blog, I have some instructional videos for you. Women who read this blog, prepare to be totally turned on. The videos will be as follows:

1. The original digital rendering video straight from the University of Northumberland, including a commentary by a man who clearly knows how to seductively move his body.

2. Another digital rendering video featuring music, so you can get a better idea how you should be moving in the real world.

3. A real, live demonstration of the Northumberland Sexy Dance Techniques by me.

Here you are:

1. Original Video:

2. Spicy Video:

3. Craig's Video:

What I've learned is that when it comes to impressing women with your dance moves, you have to go big. The University of Northumberland, the dance capital of the world, would know.